Secular Life...

I have almost been in hibernation over the last 3 weeks, well at least since my last post... Things have been challenging here with a few issues surrounding family and the children that have needed looking at.. Some of it has been so emotionally draining for both myself and my man.. we wonder how on earth we have been making it through.. It at times has left me feeling melancholy with no energy left for my blog .. it has had me struggling with my spiritual walk as well.. It is almost like there is no energy left for that either, which made me feel a little sad..
I really think the Goddess knows that we are working towards "cutting out the dead wood" in our lives so to speak, so we can make a safer and happier family, it is a painful process of realization, acceptance, anger really a whole gamut of emotions. It is funny how we/I get little messages of reassurance when I am beating myself up over various things like not having emotional energy to even light a candle.
Last night I came online to check my email, and there was a newsletter there with an article - Sustaining Growth: for solitary and all other seekers by Judy Harrow, HPs (Proteus Coven) - it suggested we take care of our secular lives first. She wrote "Abraham Maslow, the father of humanistic psychology, described a hierarchy of human needs. According to his theory, higher needs emerge only after the more basic ones are satisfied." and I think this is what I have been doing.. taking care of business and in doing so I think I have been walking the path the Goddess would have us take in this...

On a real upside my man and I have finally picked our wedding date.. Saturday, September the 19th, I didn't know when we picked the date, that it is a Dark Moon and while I was a bit iffy about that, I sort of thought that a Dark moon is a time of reflection, and the start of new beginnings I do not think it is a negative time of the lunar cycle. We have spoken to a couple of Pagan marriage celebrants who are able to make it a subtle pagan ceremony.

So apart from all the *emotional branch cutting* I also made some great sourdough bread...
I hadn't forgotten I promised to keep you updated on that..
The kids started calling it the 'mutant dough' however after the first taste it became 'great bread' *smiles* and that does my heart good, to know that the goodness of the grain along with the love and energy I put into making it, was well received by those it was meant for. Here are some photos.
Mutant dough and the finished loaf:

Hubble Bubble

What a incredibly busy few weeks..thank the Goddess - sighs, the house is quiet today - and also back in order after having the kids home for school holidays, sadly Sarah has also returned to Melbourne and having her not here, always leaves a bit of an emotional gap for me.. So over the last four days, there has been catching up on those things that just don't seem to get managed when there are extra people in the house everyday. Apart from a few veg seedlings needing to be planted and 5 kilos of tomatoes waiting to be made into soup and frozen all is quiet in my corner of the world. Although today we have had to call in a repair man for the deep freeze. It packed a sad yesterday (just as well the tomatoes are not yet soup) and decided it would be selective on what it kept frozen!
I had to toss most porous things as well as a few frozen veg that couldn't be consumed easily.. I have managed to salvage most things into a small freezer space until Monday when the parts are in, as much as a pain as it is, getting it repaired is far cheaper than a new freezer! I wonder if Samhain yesterday had anything to do with the fridges new selective freezing patterns..*smiling*

The plumber finally arrived as well, and now the kids don't run out of the bathroom screaming the toilet bowl water is bubbling.. Considering the gremlins in the bathroom/laundry plumbing and the resulting mess out the back door, one would think that I would be over the fixation with all things brewing, bubbly and fermenting - however over the last few weeks I have become slightly obsessed with making Sourdough bread.. The first few 'starters' where a no go, infact the icky messes were banished in case I poisoned the family (wonders if this is what blocked the toilet- ok now I am really laughing at that thought) then after a bit more research, I realised I was starving my wee pet.. So after wasting a few jars of the flour and water brew I hit on the combination.. she hopes.. feed it more and feed it high protein flour.. it seems it likes the rye flour a bit better.. more natural goodies for my wild yeast babies to fed upon it seems.
I am almost convinced now though, the family think I have turned into a mad woman, as every morning I race down the hall into the kitchen with Mister P and Dim Sim in hot pursuit just so I can peer into a jar of flour and water, while cooing and coaxing it to froth. Tah Dar -
Today I have been rewarded with the perfect bubbly, yeasty, slightly sour smelling jar of goodness -
At 7 am this morning, everyone circled round watching with wide eyed fasination as this pajama clad, mad woman with hair all askew, mixed up the first *sponge* like some possessed scientist.. The sponge which is really just a bowl of warm fermenting flour batter, should treble in size over the next 12 hours.. there are a few more steps as yet but the Goddess willing this will turn out to be my first ever loaf of Sourdough bread. I will keep you updated on it's progress...

On closing todays post..a total digression here... last week I thought Miss C was being unusually quiet and no where to be found when she was needed to set the dinner table. I knew Sarah was in the bathroom braiding her hair - I should have guessed Miss C would have been in there too... this is what I found when I opened the bathroom door, Sarah braiding away and Miss C happily reading in her new nest!